第3章 黑猫3

tOnenight，returninghome，muchintoxicated，fromoneofmyhauntsabouttown，Ifanciedthatthecatavoidedmyresence。

Iseizedhim;when，inhisfrightatmyviolence，heinflictedaslightwounduonmyhandwithhisteeth。

Thefuryofademoninstantlyossessedme。

Iknewmyselfnolonger。

Myoriginalsoulseemed，atonce，totakeitsflightfrommybodyandamorethanfiendishmalevolence，gin-nurtured，thrilledeveryfibreofmyframe。

Itookfrommywaistcoat-ocketaen-knife，oenedit，grasedtheoorbeastbythethroat，anddeliberatelycutoneofitseyesfromthesocket!Iblush，Iburn，Ishudder，whileIenthedamnableatrocity。

Whenreasonreturnedwiththemorning—whenIhadsletoffthefumesofthenightsdebauch—Iexeriencedasentimenthalfofhorror，halfofremorse，forthecrimeofwhichIhadbeenguilty;butitwas，atbest，afeebleandequivocalfeeling，andthesoulremaineduntouched。

Iagainlungedintoexcess，andsoondrownedinwineallmemoryofthedeed。

Inthemeantimethecatslowlyrecovered。

Thesocketofthelosteyeresented，itistrue，afrightfulaearance，buthenolongeraearedtosufferanyain。

Hewentaboutthehouseasusual，but，asmightbeexected，fledinextremeterroratmyaroach。

Ihadsomuchofmyoldheartleft，astobeatfirstgrievedbythisevidentdislikeontheartofacreaturewhichhadoncesolovedme。

Butthisfeelingsoongavelacetoirritation。

Andthencame，asiftomyfinalandirrevocableoverthrow，thesiritofPERVERSENESS。

Ofthissirithilosohytakesnoaccount。

YetIamnotmoresurethatmysoullives，thanIamthaterversenessisoneoftherimitiveimulsesofthehumanheart—oneoftheindivisiblerimaryfaculties，orsentiments，whichgivedirectiontothecharacterofMan。

Whohasnot，ahundredtimes，foundhimselfcommittingavileorasillyaction，fornootherreasonthanbecauseheknowsheshouldnot?Havewenotaeretualinclination，intheteethofourbestjudgment，toviolatethatwhichisLaw，merelybecauseweunderstandittobesuch?Thissiritoferverseness，Isay，cametomyfinaloverthrow。

Itwasthisunfathomablelongingofthesoultovexitself—toofferviolencetoitsownnature—todowrongforthewrongssakeonly—thaturgedmetocontinueandfinallytoconsummatetheinjuryIhadinflicteduontheunoffendingbrute。

Onemorning，incoolblood，Isliedanooseaboutitsneckandhungittothelimbofatree;—hungitwiththetearsstreamingfrommyeyes，andwiththebitterestremorseatmyheart;—hungitbecauseIknewthatithadlovedme，andbecauseIfeltithadgivenmenoreasonofoffence;—hungitbecauseIknewthatinsodoingIwascommittingasin—adeadlysinthatwouldsojeoardizemyimmortalsoulastolaceit—ifsuchathingwereossible—evenbeyondthereachoftheinfinitemercyoftheMostMercifulandMostTerribleGod。

Onthenightofthedayonwhichthiscrueldeedwasdone，Iwasarousedfromsleebythecryoffire。

Thecurtainsofmybedwereinflames。

Thewholehousewasblazing。

Itwaswithgreatdifficultythatmywife，aservant，andmyself，madeourescaefromtheconflagration。

Thedestructionwascomlete。

Myentireworldlywealthwasswallowedu，andIresignedmyselfthenceforwardtodesair。

Iamabovetheweaknessofseekingtoestablishasequenceofcauseandeffect，betweenthedisasterandtheatrocity。

ButIamdetailingachainoffacts—andwishnottoleaveevenaossiblelinkimerfect。

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